


Breathe Again | NoMin AU

by greenberrynomin



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-09
Updated: 2018-12-09
Packaged: 2019-09-14 19:23:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16918908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greenberrynomin/pseuds/greenberrynomin
Summary: Jeno and Jaemin starts over as friends. Life only got more beautiful but mistakes of the past are difficult to forgive and forget. But maybe with enough time, things can get even better.





	Breathe Again | NoMin AU

**Author's Note:**

> A continuation of my first Angst Oneshot "Losing My Mind".  
> Please read this first so you can have a background of what happened to their relationship.
> 
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/16008728

_What happened at the cafe...?_

 

_When Jeno arrived, Jaemin is already at their usual table, drinking his favorite coffee and reading a book. The older boy gulps nervously, not knowing what to expect; is this meeting a good thing? Or a bad thing?_

_"Excuse me." Jeno whispers, trying his best to sound confident. "Is this seat taken?"_

_Jaemin tries to stop the giggle coming out of him but fails nonetheless. "Stop being so coy Jeno. Take a seat."_

_"Thanks." A waiter approaches them. "One Hot Caramel macchiato please." Jeno orders, as the winter season starts to drizzle._

_"Are you... feeling better?" Jaemin asks, worry clear in his face._

_Jeno nods. "Much... yeah... Thank you for taking me home."_

_Jaemin shrugs. "You've always been incapable of taking care of yourself when you're drunk."_

_"Yeah, back then you always had my back." Jeno says thoughtlessly. "I mean..."_

 

_An awkward silence crowds over their small table. It may be slip of the tongue but it made them remember memories of their past; both good and bad. They didn't know what to talk about. Who should start the topic? Jeno? Jaemin?_

_"Do you remember what happened last night?" Jaemin breaks the silence._

_Jeno nods, a blush forming in his cheeks. "You mean how I unconsciously told you everything that I'm feeling?"_

_"You're blushing." Jaemin notices and it almost made him giggle again. Almost. "And you didn't use past tense."_

_Jeno shrugs. "There's no use in denying them. They're still true."_

_Jaemin sighs. “Jeno… I don’t know what to say.”_

_“I don’t know what to say either.” Jeno lowers his head. “But I do know what I want. I want you back but the feeling has to be mutual, of course. I’m not forcing you.”_

_Jaemin smiles softly and takes the older’s hand. “Jeno, I know what I want but before we go there. Can we just… start over? As friends? I don’t want us to make the same mistakes by rushing into things.”_

_“I’ll take you any way I can get you Jaemin.” Jeno tightens his hold on the boy’s hand. “Can I ask one question though?” the boy nods. “Is there something going on with you and Yukhei?”_

_Jaemin’s eyes widen as laughter erupts from his throat. “Me and Yukhei? No… he’s my roommate. He recently came from China and he was looking for a place to stay. You know how expensive my apartment was so I offered to be roomies.”  
Jeno sighs in relief. “Oh… okay good.”_

_“Jeno… are you jealous?” Jaemin chuckles cutely again but never getting an answer._

 

Jeno and Jaemin have been spending most of their time together as much as they can, together with Renjun and Yukhei who seem to be as inseparable as they are. Before they knew it, winter season has begun to make its way.

“Do you think Yukhei will ever get the courage to ask Renjun to be his boyfriend?” Jeno removes the scarf he is wearing and carefully wraps it on the younger one’s neck then intertwines their hands together.

Jaemin looks at their joint hands fondly. “I don’t know. But I sure hope so.” He breathes heavily. “Jeno look I can see my breath.”

“Do you still feel cold?” Jeno looks at the boy worriedly as they stop walking.

“No.” Jaemin smiles, his cheeks pink because of the cold… and something else. “I feel very warm.”

Jeno takes a hint of what he meant. “Well…” he spreads out his arms. “Just in case you want more warmth…”

“Don’t mind if I do.” Jaemin giggles and runs into his arms, wrapping his around his waist. “Much better.”

“You’re so cheeky.” Jeno teases but tightens his hold on him. “But I don’t mind.”

 

They had to let go of each other when they heard Yukhei shout a loud “YES!” and Renjun laughing shyly. The two runs toward Jeno and Jaemin who still has their hands joint together.

“Nana! Renjun agreed to be my boyfriend!” Yukhei says in pure happiness.

Jaemin chuckles. “Why do you sound so surprised? It was so obvious that you like each other.”

“How about us?” Jeno pulls the younger’s face by his chin and touches their nose. “It’s obvious that we too, like each other. Do you want to be my boyfriend?”

Jaemin’s cheeks turns redder than strawberries. It took all of his strength to say his answer. “N-No.”

Jeno laughs cheekily. “Couldn’t hurt to try.” He then faces the couple. “Do you guys wanna eat somewhere?”

 

Jeno, along with Jaemin, Renjun and Yukhei, goes to a diner for lunch. His heart suddenly dips down for what he is about to say. This is his last chance.

“Jaemin…” Jeno holds his hands, love in his eyes, and pain in his heart. “I love you so much, you know that right?”

Jaemin blushes. “Jeno, this is embarrassing.” He looks into the boy’s eyes and sees something is amiss. “Jeno… what’s wrong?”

“Dude, you’re scaring me.” Renjun looks worried.

Jeno chuckles. “Nana, do you want to be my boyfriend again?”

“Jeno…” Jaemin suddenly pouts. “I can’t. Not yet. I’m sorry.”

Jeno lowers his head with a sad smile on his lips. “I have something to tell you.” he looks at his friends and lastly to the person that he loves the most. “I-I’m leaving.”

“What do you mean you’re leaving?” Jaemin couldn’t hide the shock on his face.

“I got an offer to work abroad at a branch of the company.” Jeno explains. “I wasn’t sure what decision to make. Now I am.”

Yukhei’s brows furrow. “Is this why you’ve been asking Jaemin to be your boyfriend the whole day?”

Jeno chuckles. “Yeah. My decision will be based on his answer. And I got it so now I have to decide.”

“That’s unfair!” Jaemin begins to sob. “You didn’t tell me beforehand so I could choose the right answer! I want to take it back. I want to be your boyfriend again.”

Jeno smiles sadly and cups the boy’s face. “This is not your fault Nana. The reason I kept asking you is because I want to know if you’re ready to be with me again. And I can see that you’re not.”

“B-but…” Jaemin sniffles.

“It’s okay Nana. There is no right or wrong answer...” Jeno pats the younger’s hair. “I understand. We’ve never really given each other space since we made up. We were always together as if nothing went wrong between us. I want us to start over but to do that we have to learn to be without each other.”

 

Renjun wraps an arm around a crying Jaemin while Yukhei has his head down. Jeno smiles, feeling nostalgic. A few months ago, he was the biggest asshole that exists but he was so whipped for the crying boy beside him that he changed himself. And he changed for the better. Once again, Jaemin showed him the light and he will always be grateful for that.

“W-what if you fall in love with someone else when you’re away? What if I meet someone else? W-what if…” Jaemin says hysterically.

Jeno shrugs. “Then that means we’re not really meant to be together. Although, I doubt that I’ll meet someone in Paris who is like you Jaemin. You’re the only one for me.”

“Y-you’re going to Paris??? The City of Love?” Jaemin gets a nod. “Great… That makes me feel a lot better.” his voice drips with sarcasm.

Jeno chuckles lightly and wipes the tears in the younger’s eyes. “I leave a week before Christmas. Would you mind spending those remaining days with me Nana?”

Jaemin sniffles and lets out a few tears. “O-okay.”

 

Just like they promised, Jaemin and Jeno spends the remaining days together. The younger one accepts the latter’s invitation to move back to their old home until he leaves. Once again, their house gets filled with life. They would spend their days playing in the snow outside their house, or skating in a nearby frozen pond, or if it’s too cold to go outside, just lie down on their couch in front of their fireplace watching a movie, with their arms wrapped around each other; either way it was perfect.

 

But as always, all good things must come to an end. Eventually the day of Jeno’s departing came, Jaemin, Renjun and Yukhei comes along to say goodbye. The oldest already has his arms around Jaemin who’s crying silently.

“You’re really going, huh?” Renjun has his hands inside his pockets. “You’re really leaving.”

Jeno nods. “Injun-ah, I have a favor to ask. You’re the only one I trust to do this. I know you have Yukhei now. But you’re my best friend and…”

Renjun nods understandingly. “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of Jaemin.”

“Thank you.” Jeno engulfs his best friend into a tight hug.

 

Renjun taps Jaemin’s shoulder and the boy leans on him right away to let Yukhei say his goodbyes.

“You can still change your mind y’know?” Yukhei lowers his head. “You don’t have to leave. You never know, I might take Nana away from you.”

Jeno couldn’t help but chuckle. “You’re so whipped for my best friend, I doubt you’ll even find the time to look at other people.”

Yukhei joins in on the laughter. “You’re right.”

“Yukhei, I’ve never thanked you for… looking out for him when I was an asshole.” Jeno whispers.

Yukhei puts a hand on the younger’s shoulder. “Just promise me that you’ll come back for him and we’re cool.”

 

Jeno saves his favorite person for last. His light. His love. Na Jaemin. Who is already crying his eyes out by the time Jeno opens his arms for him and slams their bodies together in a loud thud.

“Nana, please stop crying.” Jeno runs his hand across his back. “I don’t want to leave seeing you like this.”

“Then don’t leave.” Jaemin hugs the boy tighter. “Don’t leave me again Jeno.”

Jeno pushes the younger one softly. “This time is different. This time I’m leaving so that we can be together forever. This time I have a reason to come back. I may be gone but I’ll carry you inside my heart always.”

“You’re just saying that to make me feel better.” Jaemin pouts.

Jeno laughs, finding him adorable. “Well, is it working?” he gets slight nod. “Ah, before I forget…” he rummages through his bag. “I have a present for you.” He hands the other a small box.

“I should be the one giving you a present.” Jaemin grabs the box and opens it, his eyes widen. “Is this…?” he gets a nod. “I thought you didn’t know where it is?”

Jeno takes the necklace with a blue pebble with an outer gold ring as a pendant out of the box. “This is the pebble that you took at the playground where we first kissed. I’ll always know where it is.” he clasps it around the younger boy’s neck. “And now you will too.”

“J-Jeno…” Jaemin chokes. “You’re making it harder for me to let you go.” he broke into sobs.

“I love you Na Jaemin. I will always love you.”

 

With one final kiss on Jaemin’s lips, Jeno walks away with his bags and his heavy heart. He takes one last look at the three people who meant so much to him and sees the love of his life being comforted by the two people he trusts the most.

 

No one knows how long Jeno will stay at Paris but Jaemin believes that he will come back. Because even when he was a thousand miles away, Jeno never fails to make him feel loved the way that he deserves to be loved. Every month, the older one will send Jaemin a bouquet of flowers with a hand-written letter; telling him how much he misses him and how much he wishes the younger one is with him in Paris.

 

But then, when the fifth year began, the flowers stopped coming. Jaemin waited for the whole January but nothing came, February passed and still no flowers, March gave way to spring but no flowers from a boy in Paris came. December finally arrives and it’s the anniversary of when Jeno left for abroad. Jaemin visits the playground where they shared their first kiss, and unclasps the necklace around his neck.

“You told me you’d always love me.” Jaemin sobs looking at the blue pebble. “I waited for you but you didn’t even have the guts to break up with me properly.” he throws the necklace far from where he was standing and runs off.

 

Jaemin finds himself crying in Renjun’s arms. Yukhei is already heating up a cup of chocolate milk for the sobbing mess in his boyfriend’s arms.

“I hate him!” Jaemin sobs in the blonde boy’s chest. “I hate him for making me wait for nothing!”

Renjun runs his hand on the boy’s back. “Nana, I’m sure Jeno has a perfectly good explanation why he stopped contacting you.” he tries to comfort him.

“Here.” Yukhei hands the cup and a box of tissue to the youngest. “Look, Jeno hasn’t contacted either of us too. Maybe he’s just busy.”

Jaemin groans. “For a whole year? I’m not stupid Yukhei. I’m sure he found someone else in Paris.” he blows his nose. “I can’t believe I waited for him for 5 years.” he hears the two chuckle. “Why are you two laughing? This isn’t funny! I was so prepared to ask him to be my boyfriend the second he lands on a flight back here.”

“Back then, you wouldn’t get out of your room when Jeno left.” Renjun looks at him proudly. “Look at you now.”

Jaemin suddenly looks confused. “I’m probably gonna live alone for the rest of my life why are looking at me like that?”

“It’s nothing.” Yukhei suddenly interjects. “I have an idea to help you not live alone for the rest of your life.”

“Huh?” Jaemin lets Renjun wipes his tears like the baby that he is.

Yukhei takes out his phone, looking for something. “Let’s go on a party on Christmas. You never know. You might meet the love of your life there.”

Jaemin eyes the oldest. “Sounds suspicious Yukhei.”

“Oh come on Nana!” Renjun persuades him. “If you wouldn’t get a potential man in that party at least it can help you get your kind off that idiot best friend of mine.”

Jaemin suddenly sighs sadly. “I _am_ getting tired of crying for Jeno. So okay. No more waiting. I’ll go.”

 

December 25 comes, Jaemin arrives with Renjun and Yukhei at the latter’s friend’s house, Mark Lee. The place is filled with people wearing Santa hats and drinks in their hands. He didn’t feel like his friends are setting him up with Mark or anything maybe they just doesn’t want him to be alone. But even with people around him, Jaemin feels lonely.

 

Undetected by the two, Jaemin slips out of the house and heads back to the playground. Using the light on his phone, he looks for the necklace that the love of his life gave him 5 years ago. But luck wasn’t on his side.

“Where is it???” Jaemin starts to panic. “I’m so stupid. Why did I throw it so far?” tears pool in his eyes. “Jeno’s gonna kill me if he finds out.” he sits on one of the swings. “When are you coming back?”

 

Jaemin calms himself down and starts to walk. Unknowingly, his feet carries him back to his old home. The home that contains all memories of him and Jeno, both the good and the bad.

“I wouldn’t change anything that happened to us. Because loving you is the greatest thing that I have ever done.” Jaemin holds the door and closes his eyes in prayer. “So please… come back to me Jeno.”

 

Jaemin slowly opens the door and everything is dark just like he expected. He opens the light and with a heavy heart, he sees nothing has changed. He walks forwards when suddenly, he feels his feet kick something. As he looks down, he sees a path of boxes making its way to the second floor.

 

As he opens the first one, his eyes widen when he sees a bouquet of flowers with a note:

 

_January - Daffodils_

 

_These flowers represent new beginnings, joy and happiness. As the year comes to a close, I want to start the next one with you and maybe begin again._

 

Jaemin takes the flowers and moves on to the second box.

 

_February - Tulips_

 

_These ones represent perfect love. I would’ve given you roses but they’re too common. You deserve something more unique just like you. Our love may not be perfect but you will always be in my eyes._

 

The third one…

 

_March - Cherry Blossoms_

 

_The symbol of purity and beauty. A flower that can define you. You are the most beautiful person that I have ever known, inside and out. Your heart is so pure that I find it hard to believe that I deserve someone like you. But I’m not complaining._

 

Fourth one…

 

_April – Daisies_

_Flowers of cheerfulness, sincerity and innocence. One of the things that I love about you is your smile. It’s so filled with warmth that I can’t help but smile, they’re always filled with happiness and sincerity. You may act like a kid but I love it when you do. You’re innocence makes you so beautiful that I can’t help but tear up._

 

Fifth box…

 

_May – Lily of the Valley_

_“The return of happiness”. Letting you go is the worst mistake that I have ever made. But by some miracle, you found it in your heart to forgive me. I may not deserve it but I promise you… I’m not planning on repeating that same mistake._

 

By the time that Jaemin reached the sixth box, he already has a hard time seeing anything because of the tears that pooled in his eyes.

 

_June – Honeysuckle_

_It symbolizes devoted affection in the form of a lover's embrace. 5 years has been a long time coming but what kept going is the day that I get to hold you in my arms again._

 

Jaemin reaches the middle of the staircase for the seventh box.

 

_July – Larkspur_

_This one symbolizes an open heart and can be associated with strong romantic feelings. They say wearing heart in your sleeves is risky but even when people are scary as shit, you wear your heart so proudly that it only makes me want to protect you. You deserve all the good things in this world._

 

Eighth box…

 

_August – Gladiolus_

_A bouquet conveys to the recipient that they pierce the giver's heart with passion. Need I say more?_

 

Ninth box…

 

_September – Aster_

_They're known as a talisman of love and a symbol of patience. You’re getting closer to me my love. I’ll be waiting._

 

Tenth box…

 

_October – Cosmos_

_Orderly, beautiful, balanced; tranquility; modesty; ornamental; peacefulness, wholeness; love _flower.__

_The eleventh box stops just right in front of their bedroom door._

_November – Chrysanthemum_

_Symbolize longevity, fidelity, joy and optimism. I’m hoping you’ll say yes Jaemin. Please say yes._

Jaemin opens the door and flicks the lights on. He sees a huge box next to their bed. Walking slowly towards it, he sees the note on top of the box unlike the previous one where it’s attached with the bouquets.

 

_December – Baby’s Breath_

_Here’s to our own version of an Everlasting Love._

 

Jaemin removes the top of the box which is almost as big as he is. As he places the cover on the ground with the rest of the flowers, Jeno stands up holding a bouquet of baby’s breaths with a large satisfied smile on his face causing his eyes to disappear; seeing Jaemin with a tear-streaked surprised face.

“Nana, why are you crying?” Jeno asks.

The shock never left Jaemin’s face. “You’re here. You’re actually here.”

“I’m here.” Jeno nods and opens his arms. “Did you miss me?”

“Jeno!!!” Jaemin runs and wraps his arms around the boy that he’s been missing for five years. “I thought… you…”

Jeno chuckles. “That I what??? Forget you? Oh Jaemin, you really don’t trust me that much huh?”

“Can you blame?” Jaemin sobs. “You stopped contacting any of us right when the year started.”

Jeno shrugs, softly pulls the boy away to look at him. “Well, I didn’t want to ruin the surprise.”

Jaemin softly hits the older one’s chest. “You’re so lucky I love you!!!”

“I love you too.” Jeno caresses the boy’s face, wiping the tears in his eyes. “I will always love you. It doesn’t matter if we’re together or not. You’re the only one who has my heart. And after all these years, I have been itching to ask you this, Na Jaemin, will… you…”

“YES!” Jaemin shouts.

Jeno laughs loudly, his eyes disappearing once more. “Can you at least let me finish the question? I’ve been looking forward to this since day 1.” The younger boy joins in on the laughter and shuts his lips like a kid. “Na Jaemin, will you be my boyfriend?”

Jaemin nods over and over again. “Yes Lee Jeno. Yes. I’ll be your boyfriend.”

 

Jeno engulfs Jaemin into his arms again and tightens his hold to the love of his life, looking forward to this day since he landed in Paris. He releases the younger boy and gives the bouquet to Jaemin. The latter receives the bouquet with a smile and sees that at the center of it, is the necklace that he’s been looking for at the playground.

“LEE JENO!!!!” Jaemin exclaims causing the older one to laugh at his surprised face again. “You’ve been here since when?”

Jeno winks. “My plane landed yesterday. I didn’t know what to give you for Christmas. I know that I’m not perfect but I wanted to give myself to you as a gift.”

“You’re perfect Jeno. You’re the perfect gift for me.” Jaemin holds the older one’s hands.

 

Jeno winks again and looks above them. Jaemin follows suit and looks up, he chuckles as he sees a mistletoe above them. Jeno caresses Jaemin’s soft cheeks, wet with tears but still manages to look the most beautiful human being in this planet. The latter closes his eyes as Jeno finally makes their lips touch. A kiss so magical, so filled with longing for each other, both of their cheeks are wet with tears. Jeno misses the Jaemin’s lips fits perfectly with his, its still so soft, so pure that it only makes him miss it more. The latter tears of the box pulling the older one closer to him, running his hands through his hair.

 

The bedroom door suddenly opens revealing Yukhei and Renjun holding a wine bottle with party hats on their heads.

“CONGRATUL-----“ they pause when they witness the newly reunited couple.

“Ooops...” Yukhei scratches the back of his neck. “I think we disturbed them Injun.”

Jaemin throws a pillow at the eldest. “Yes, yes you did.”

 

Jeno laughs as the older ones runs to welcome him back. Five years is a long time and many can happen in that time but in those years, one thing didn’t change. Jeno made the worst mistake in his life years ago but he learned from it. Jaemin almost lost the love of his life, he almost lost all hope but even though it was hard, he held on. Five years was a long time but Jaemin and Jeno’s love for each other stayed the same, and now that they’re back in each other’s arms, nothing can tear them apart ever again.


End file.
